ok i have te manual with tj box but on colds mornings its very hard to get it in to gear crunches a bit to im bit worried what oil should i be replacing this with i dont wanan do another diff

on auto gearboxes is exactly opposite......... when it's cold it shift as a manual........but if you race it a little bit it will shift like a woman

I guess it needs an aftermarket oil cooler

I have a TE manual as well (original box, not TJ) and I used to have the same problem on cold mornings.
I did a bit of checking and found that the standard manual box oil is pretty thick (high viscosity) and when it is cold the synchros don't work too flash, which causes the baulky and crunchy change, especially from 1st to 2nd.
I replaced the oil with auto transmission fluid and it was way better.
Apparently it is pretty much the same oil just with lower viscosity (thinner).
That was about three years ago and no problems at all.

Kimbo